Mental housecleaning

I’ve had a hard time with mental housecleaning today. My inside voice has not been kind today. When negativity arose this morning while I sat on the toilet, I said to myself:
“I love & approve of myself, I love & approve of myself, I love & approve of myself.”

I have limiting beliefs that are running my life, or lack of life.

– I’m not good enough
– Lack of self-love
– Life is dangerous

These are beliefs that were instilled in me growing up. Things that were said by relatives, teachers, friends, authority figures. If we write down these negative messages, we can objectively see where certain beliefs came from.

Some beliefs that make me feel not good enough

– My grandma told an old boyfriend of mine I was lazy.

– My grandfather always cautioned someone would steal me when I went outside

– My brother called me stupid & a loser

– My grade 5 teacher called me pokey

– My aunts ask when I’ll have good news that I’m with someone (because apparently that is all that matters in this world)

& so on.

Louise Hay says to toss them out; let them go as easily as you would scrape bits of food into the trash after a meal.

Would you really dig into yesterday’s garbage to make tonight’s dinner?

Do you dig into old mental garbage to create tomorrow’s experiences?

If a thought or belief doesn’t serve you let it go. Just because you believe it once, doesn’t mean you have to believe it forever.

Free & forgive these people, then you will be able to free yourself.

Here is a great mediation that can help by Ellaeenah Jadefire Healing The Inner Child

Can you relate?

Manifesting the Relationship You Want

Ask yourself: Am I practicing the path to what I want OR Am I practicing the path that is easiest to practice? (i.e. complaining because complaining comes naturally)

Focus on, identify with and determine the type of relationship you want. Think about:

  • What it would feel like to be in this delicious relationship
  • What it feels like to be the object of someone’s attention
  • What it feels like to move through life, making decisions together
  • What invincibility feels like
  • What love and appreciation feels like

THINK ABOUT IT, REACH FOR IT, FIND THE FEELING!

Once you’ve identified and practiced what it would feel like, you are on the path of least resistance.

Every time you feel worried, you’re off the path. Every time you’re frustrated, you’re off the path. Every time you’re lonely, you’re off the path. When you are moody, critical or picky, you are off the path.

When you feel happy, invincible, appreciation for anything YOU ARE ON THE PATH.

Open your path by doing things you like.

When things don’t go well, LAUGH. Bask in the joy you are on your way to changing your way of thinking. LAUGH and say “Ain’t that the way the life goes? At least I know I’m on my way to my path and I’m making conscious changes.”

The point of power

The point of power is in the present moment, but I cannot seem to claim it.

I am holding onto negativity from Friday. I felt and still feel blown off, and I pushed it down until today, when I brought it up. I hear crickets. It’s fine if my friend does not want to acknowledge my discomfort, after all it is MY discomfort & I need to work through it.

Thoughts create my future and I do not want these negative thoughts to create tomorrow.

I forgive my friend for not being the person I wanted her to be. I forgive her & I set the situation free.

wish

My Dating Pattern

When I don’t hear from a boy I eat. I eat until my stomach is so full.

I don’t participate in many activities except eating & watching TV.

I disregard the gym and life outside of my house.

When I get in a good groove I feel good. I’m not a slave to my phone and I leave the house. Then I’ll meet a guy and I’ll feel happy. We’ll talk all the time, I’ll think he’s the one — & then we’ll meet and I’ll further convince myself that yes, he is THE ONE.

We’ll make out, fool around, maybe more.

We’ll see each other again — & the slow decline begins: less texts/I have to initiate. I’ll start having expectations like “It’s Friday night therefore we are hanging out.” AND I wait around to hear from him, decline other invites if any arise and make my life revolve around someone I just met.

BLACK & WHITE — I deserve to be cherished and asked out.

I am a lovely woman and I deserve to be treated the way I would treat a man: with love, honour and devotion.

I focus on me, but quickly get lost in the chase for a man & lose myself.

10 Unhealthy Dating Patterns And How To Break Them (summarized)

The article linked above is worth reading a few times! In fact, I’ve bookmarked it. We all know love is blind, so here are a few tips:

  1. No Fantasizing: hard to control, but when you catch yourself reliving that great date, STOP! Snap back into reality
  2. Do Not Get Involved With Unavailable Men: Self explanatory
  3. Stop Chasing Guys: They will ask you out
  4. SLOW DOWN: Get to know the person before declaring them your soulmate. Keep your first few dates confined to a shorter period of time so as to avoid that We talked all night! high, followed by the Where the fuck did he go? low.
  5. Be Cautious of TMI: Don’t tell each other your life stories off the bat
  6. Persure Your Own Dreams: Don’t date a guy just because he has the success you want for yourself
  7. Approve of Yourself: No need to seek outside approval
  8.  LIVE YOUR LIFE: Do not sit around and wait for a text
  9. Again, LIVE YOUR LIFE: Keep active with all that you would normally do
  10. No More Brief, Chaotic Relationships Followed by Periods of Isolation: When operating like the above, you will find yourself here. (Like me: in the last six months I have had countless two week “relationships.”) You will slowly lose yourself and the ability to function how you normally would. Let go of these bad dating patterns, reach out to friends for support, let yourself heal.

AFFIRMATION

I am willing to release the pattern in my consciousness that has created this condition. I release the past and let it wash away. I take back my own power.

Finding comfort

Simon And Garfunkel – El Condor Pasa (if I Could) 

I’d rather be a sparrow than a snail
Yes I would
If I could, I surely would
Hmm mmm

I’d rather be a hammer than a nail
Yes I would
If I only could, I surely would
Hmm mmm

Away, I’d rather sail away
Like a swan that’s here and gone
A man gets tied up to the ground
He gives the world its saddest sound, its saddest sound
Hmm mmm

I’d rather be a forest than a street
Yes I would
If I could, I surely would

I’d rather feel the earth beneath my feet
Yes I would
If I only could, I surely would

 

Going Down…

I was in an elevator yesterday, and the conversation between two ladies went something like this:

“I went to lunch with Christina today! It was nice.”

“Oh, that’s lovely”

“She’s so pretty. She looks so good everyday. I told her to stop being so pretty!”

*giggles from both ladies*

This light hearted laced sarcasm is a mask covering insecurities and envy. So many women believe something is wrong with their appearance. We compare and contrast internally, and then joke about it out loud to others.

Sarcasm is negative. The undertone of any sarcastic remark is full of negativity.

Let’s embrace our own beauty and the beauty of others.

Be Still & Know

I’m not entirely sure how I feel today, but I know my vibration is out of whack. So I take deep breaths & let go with love.

I acknowledge I am the object of your positive attention & I appreciate your continual gaze on behalf of my wellbeing. Today, no matter where I’m going, who I’m with & who I’m doing it with I will be in conscious awareness that you are there with me, guiding me, acknowledging me, inspiring me, aware of me, loving me, supporting me, showing me, uplifting me. – Words to the universal forces by Abraham Hicks.

Job Wish List

CONTRAST (previous position’s attributes)   VS. CREATE (the position I want to have)

Being under appreciated     vs.     Appreciated

Making $15/hr     vs.     Earning $60K

Not being able to use my education     vs.     Using my PR & Social Media skills

Being the receptionist     vs.     Being a coordinator

Undervalued     vs.     Valued

Anxiety     vs.     Happy at work

Stressed     vs.     Relaxed

I want a job where there is room for professional growth and development, one that is well paid, where I get to manage social media channels, where I get to implement strategies and where I get to coordinate events with an inspirational team and boss.

What are the values I want my next work place to have

I want to work in a place where there are health benefits, with a friendly culture, a company that cares about their employees’ well being and work/life balance. I want to work in a place where there are other young people, in a fun, encouraging environment.

AFFIRMATION

I am totally open & receptive to a wonderful, new position. One that uses all my talents and abilities and allows me to express creatively in ways that are fulfilling to me. I work with and for people whom I like & respect and who like and respect me, in a wonderful location, earning good money.